I was reading this post at The Mad momma’s yesterday and the post and the comments made me feel as if I am in a parallel universe. Maids for my kid, one or in multiples? Help that takes care of my child while I go for beauty treatments or whatever else treatments? Are there even options like that out there?
Most of you moms (unless you are Warren Buffet or married to someone like that) staying outside India do not have a house help who takes care of the kid I guess. You can have nannies but they are not there to take care of the kids whims and fancies while you rush in and out of beauty parlors or coffee shops. If you have to take your kids to the peds, you do it. If to the park again it’s you (or the hubby). If your kid wants a certain dinner or certain lunch for school, you cook it up. If your kid is sick, you stay up all night, alternate work days with the hubby, come back home bleary eyed to cook and feed the child, and have a restless night again. All in all you are involved in all aspects of your child. Fact is you do not have a choice but to do it yourself.
I do pine for some help, specially when I am back from work and try to rest a little and the now 3 and ½ year old thinks I should have taken my nap at office and this is time for jumping around like her. But I know this is my child and not my neigbour’s, so smiling and saying “Darling” and making “sweet talk” or reading a couple of books alone at the end of the day is not enough. I have to be involved in every aspect of her life. I have never had the good fortune to have a house help (except for the lady who drops in to clean) and I don’t know how their existence would have changed my life or my involvement with my daughter. All I know is if there’s anything that needs to get done for her it’s her parents that have to do it. There simply is no choice.
Its not only about "quality time", a phrase used very very widely these days, kids also need time in "quantity" from their parents. I as a parent feel my role is not only to read a few books and make trips to the park with her. My job as a parent calls for much more. The fact that I do all the small chores for her from cooking to feeding to taking her to bed to teaching her to use the bathroom to washing her up makes me feel very satisfied. Maybe I do not do all these to perfection and it also takes up a lot of my time, time that I could have spent at the park with her, but at the end of the day I feel I have done my best for my daughter. Afetr all we did have fun together making shapes out of the flour dough while I rolled out rotis and we can go to the park tomorrow...
What do you think? If you have a house help at all to help with the kid, how do you distribute the kids work with her? If you don’t have one, how much do you think you would let the house help be involved with your kids work/activities?
To stir up some interest during a lethargic summer week day I am writing this. I am neither for or against house help/maid or anything. So please post your views as you feel it.