We finally dared!

Posted by Cee Kay of My Two Cents. This is also cross posted on my personal blog.

In the 12 years that we have been married, J and I have NEVER gone out on New Year's Eve. CAN YOU BELIEVE THAT? We are more of homebodies than we would actually care to admit. At first we didn't go out because we were living with my husband's parents and they kind of frowned upon it. By the time we came to America, we had S and we didn't go out because we didn't want to disrupt her routine. Besides, we liked the coziness of our house compared to the chilly air outside. Now we have M too, so going out on New Year's eve is unthinkable. Or so one would assume.

Today, after I came back from work, it suddenly occurred to me that I didn't really want to be stuck at home eating leftovers for dinner. So I managed to convince J to take us out for dinner. Initially we planned to go to an Indian restaurant but cancelled the plans when we called them and were told that the restaurant was packed. Then we decided to go to Bertucci's - an Italian restaurant. We were still concerned about how M will behave as she was already tired and starting to get cranky. But this baby of ours is a social animal - we realized long time back.

So we just got ready quickly and left. M behaved really well for most of the time. She only started getting restless towards the end and we were ready to leave by then. I have found a trick to minimizing her tantrums when we go out. I DON'T feed her before leaving. Yes. That's right! And that is because she loves to eat. So I feed her when we get where we are going. That always works well and always gives us some time before she gets cranky.

All in all, we had a good time tonight. So this was our "Dare to" project this December - to give me fodder for this month's theme! I had a completely different post in mind but hadn't gotten around to writing it. Then, while returning from the restaurant, it hit me that this fits the theme better. So, now you know what we never did before today and dared to do today :D

Dare we party? Yes!

This post is written by Sue from Sunny Days. She is not a mommy blogger in that her blog is not only about her son (The Bhablet), but she is both a mum and a blogger. There's not much to say about her blog, really. It's about her thoughts and her days and depending on how interesting they are, the blog switches from being fun to dull to thoughtful. 'Nuff said!

I understand this month we've been dared to do something that we don't normally do. What I've been doing may not seem very exciting or especially daring to you but it's certainly changing the quality of our lives. My son is fifteen months old, very sociable and excitable and a very light sleeper. So for the last twelve odd months we have been coming home at his bedtime (9 p.m.), running our lives by his circadian cycle. This month I have been staying out late, keeping him up late, letting him play around with his meal times and nap times, going for midnight drives -- in short, doing the stuff we'd stopped for fear of ruining his night's sleep. And it's working! We're getting to do as we want but he's still falling asleep on schedule or at least falling asleep in our arms when tired (a real rarity when we are out and surrounded by bright lights and people). I'm not sure exactly what worked, but something has and I'm thankful this happened when the party season was in full swing!

Dare to Care

[posted by Sheela at The Joy of My Life]

Hope Daring December will finally push me over the edge. Into proper humanness, that is.

At the risk of appearing to be an irrational chicken, let me continue with the post...

Some evenings when I am driving home and not taking the bus, I pass this particular traffic signal. Sometimes the light is red and I stop as required. And right at the same corner spot I see an elderly gentleman looking defeated and hopeless, yet, standing there in his inadequate jacket that barely shields him against the winter winds and the icy rains, holding up a tattered and soggy sign with barely legible letters: VETERAN. HOMELESS. HELP.

I have not had the courage to approach this homeless elderly veteran so far and extend some form of personal hand by way of conversation and aid. I simply pass by sending a silent prayer skywards. I have this irrational fear that he would take it the wrong way, scoff or outright yell at me for trying to give him what I can afford and offer at that time. Very Silly. I agree.

So far, we have been doing what little we can by way of charity in what can be construed as a fairly detached and anonymous way. It is easy to send a check to my parents who visit their local charities in Chennai, India (Udavum Karangal, or Vishranthi or any number of such charities in their city) on special days and dispense much-needed items there.

It is easy enough to pick a charity (local/nationwide/international) and send what we can - handmade crochet items, blankets, clothes, coats or even just a check. Dropping off non-perishables at Oregon Food Bank (OFB) collection points, and giving away old coats and blankets to Portland Rescue Mission (PRM) has been easy enough.

All very normal and behind the scenes. But, not hands-on. Fairly impersonal.

But browsing the items from PRM's Wish List for dropping off at their office had me exploring their website for the first time. And, something in PRM's website struck a cord in me - a practical suggestion: have a nutritious granola bar or something handy, attach a couple of TriMet bus tickets to the bar, add a coupon with meal times and directions to PRM, approach with a smile and offer "Would you like this bar of snack?".

I still haven't mustered up the courage to approach this gent. It is less painful to watch for the light to turn green and step on the accelerator. But, I do have a few granola bars, Trimet tickets and PRM's coupons handy in my purse. Perhaps I will finally have the courage to roll down my window and extend a granola-bar-laden hand his way, praying that he will take it...

Awakened and liberated...

[This post was written by Tharini of Winkie's Way.]

I read Kay's December challenge and thought to myself...what an amazing and unique idea for such an amazing month! Only a Saggittarian can think of something so liberating like this! :D

I thought to myself of all the things I'd like to get over! It forms a list! And here I go, dipping into that list and examining things one by one...

Swimming. I wish I could swim. I tried once a long time ago in school, and developed fear of water. I am ready to try it again, but not this year, or the next. Maybe after my trip to India. Right now, I don't see it as much of a priority on my list.

Singing. I can sing. Or at least, I reckon I can. And I want to. But lack the guts to do it for fear of sounding all off key and looking foolish. But this weekend might take care of that. For there is a christmas party with karaoke session at a good friend's place, and attendance means compulsarily singing. Hmmm. :)

A friendship gone awry. A long time ago, when I was in college, me and a very good friend of mine shared an apartment. We were close, we were inseparable. And then one fine day, we got into a misunderstanding. It was something that I did, which she misinterpreted to be something else, and I was so dazed and upset that she could think that way about me, that I never tried to explain. And because of that wounded ego, I let her go. And I never got closure. We'd meet in college and cross paths but would ignore each other. The awkwardness was terrible. 3 years of college ended and we completely disappeared from each other's lives. Just 2 weeks ago, we reconnected on Facebook. And I realised how much I had missed her and how much more easier it was to say all those things now, when the wisdom in my life had grown. So I got in touch, explained things from all those 12 years ago, and we laughed over it. She wished me on my birthday and made my day. We may not go on to rekindle the lost friendship to the full, but we hold no more grudges.

Feeling like a person. This is probably the most transforming thing that has happened for me as a result of Kay's post and theme for December. Her thoughts in it spoke to me long after I had finished reading it, and it has altered my attitude in the way that I feel sooooo much more open and willing to try new things. It made me realise what a RUT I had gotten into as a SAHM and made me want to break out of it and become fresh again. For instance, dressing up. There's not much need to dress up and look nice when the most outdoor thing that you see on a cold winter's day is the little trip to drop off my son to school, or at the most to pick up some groceries. Another instance, as a result of all my ideals to live simply and not get into the web of material wants, I had begun living like a hermit. In a way that was good as it served my ideals and proved to me that life can be kept very simple, but on the other hand, because I was not that spiritually advanced yet, I stopped feeling like a real person. With my own needs and wants. It just became all about the kids. I never thought much or cared about terms like losing one's identity until today. Today, I felt that I had let myself slip. I was living my life too intertwined with that of my kids and not enough for myself. Living for yourself is not selfishness. Its a necessary exercise to stay mentally healthy. So anyway, back to the hermit thing. I had become such a hermitess that I had forgotten how to even buy clothes for myself. I used to do that till last year. Refreshed wardrobe every few months. And now, nothing. The very thought of going shopping for myself was such an unpalatable proposition. (I know this is very hard to relate to, so just stick with me, I am coming to the point!)

Thinking about myself had become like a foreign feeling that its going to take getting used to again. But once in a way I want to do just that. I plan to go buy myself something nice to wear for that party. I'll go shopping on my own, just the way I used to and just swipe that credit card for material goods! *gasp*

Being in hibernation. Winter comes along and I seem to go into social hibernation. I begin to feel like its impossible to subject myself and my young ones to the brutal cold of the outside and so we stay cooped up at home and getting on each other's nerves. Add to that the feeling that I cannot go out much because its too hard to handle 2 kids by myself. What rubbish!! Kay, your post is making me see even this with a new eye. I am feeling more adventurous and willing to say to everything....WHY NOT? And so I am busy planning out Winkie's Christmas break of the next 10 days. I want to fill it as much as is logistically possible and keep our mornings busy and our afternoons light. I plan to call up old friends I haven't been in touch with in awhile and make plans to meet. I want to take him to the children's museum. So what if Thambi is around too. I am sure I can manage them both! At the most, the little one will cry because he is sleepy or hungry, that's all!

So Kay, that's my contribution to the awakening and liberating December. Your theme has made me look at myself in a new light and filled me up with renewed hope. I feel young and fearless and like everything is possible. Can I have this to keep forever? :D

I wish I....

I didn't have to think hard about what to post for Daringly Different December. It was easy to come up with a list of half dozen. Here is the top one on my list. Thanks, Kay, for the push.

Please, no laughs and smirks. It won't help me get anywhere!
---------
I wish I could swim.

It is pathetic, I know. Not knowing to swim. As a kid, I missed out on swim lessons. My school built a brand new pool and made swimming part of curriculum with all the hard earned money my parents poured in. Unfortunately, it was a tad too late for me; the pool was inagaurated the year I left :(

It is not like I haven't tried since then. One summer, I thought I should just get an outfit (err...swimsuit) first and see how comfortable I felt in it. I spent about 15 frustrating minutes in the relevant section and convinced myself that they just didn't make any that would fit both my size and my inhibition. I called my husband on the phone, weeped my woes out to him and melodramatically ran out of the store.

The next season, I tried again. I figured I should pay the money and sign up for the classes first, and that would force me to shed all inhibitions and full sleeved clothes. One week before the payment was due, I discovered I was pregnant.

There ended that thought. Two years later, I am still in the "I wish I could..."
stage. But the dream hasn't been squashed, only fueled some more.

Here's my ray of hope - my son doesn't know to swim either! Maybe I could learn with him?

Here I go!

Once in a while, I crave for a nice home made biryani.... Who doesn't? :) Especially in this winter? And whenever this urge came, I succumbed and made a quick fix (read: horrible) biryani made in rice cooker or using pressure pan. The rice cooker or pressure pan were not at fault, but my quick fix methods were. :)

And the cravings just increased (Noooooooooooo, I'm not pregnant!). I wished I could get off my lazy bum and make a real biryani but kept postponing it... half-cook the rice, half-cook the chicken in the masala, layer them and bake - just yummylicious!!! I do make a good biryani Should I say, used to make? So, when was it that I made a full length biryani? hmmm... It was when my mil was here...When was that? A year ago?? :o Wow, Am I this lazy?

So, you guys where this is going, right? I chose December's theme and I have to something that I wish I did........... So, I did it! I made the biryani yesterday evening - a full length biryani - a sumptuous one if I can say so.

And I didn't stop there... Last weekend, I invited some friends over for lunch and dinner. I love having people over. Ever since the baby came, I had just stopped inviting friends. And oh, that baby is a toddler now, so, you know how much time has passed. Thankfully I have great friends who kept inviting me and fed me and my family, but I never got to give back some of that love. So, last weekend, I had invited some friends and had a great time with them. :) And I plan to do this very often from now on. It wasn't difficult at all and I just loved it.

What else did I do? Ah!!! I went to the gym yesterday morning - first time in three years. yayyy! Before that, I used to be a health-nut before that and practically live in the gym. In the last 3 yrs, I had done some exercises at home - yoga sometime, pilates sometime, treadmill sometime but exercising at home didn't thrill me to bits like the gym did. It also helped that there is a very nice gym in my apartment building. I had been thinking forever that I should go there and see how I like it... I finally did it yesterday.

So, Anybody else joining me this month? Cmon guys, let's just do it.
Read more details at Daring December.

This was long overdue !

Sorry that was a mistake ! i clicked on enter too soon. Well ! for the last 10 yrs that i have been in US i never learnt to drive. Being in downtown, it was pretty easy for me to walk down whenever and wherever i wanted to not depending on my hubby.I also had the luck of having many friends within the apartment bldg. But now there is a big difference. We have moved to the suburbs and the thought of being not able to go out scares me....I felt trapped though we go out on weekends and even mid week for other stuff.i had to be independent i felt to be able to go out and do what i want.

The thought of learning to drive sends shivers up my spine. Am I going to meet with an accident, is somebody going to hit me from behind ....i had nightmares. But then these things have to be overlooked. i decided what the hell just go and do it.
Well! i have given my exam and have taken a few driving lessons.I am not yet confident but i am on my way to becoming a new me. It is going to be sometime before i learn to fully drive and get comfy. Till then the heart is beating really fast. Can you all mommies listen to it !

Daring December!

Hi ladies,

This month, let's do something different. There is at least one thing in everybody's list of 'I wish I did that' or 'I wish I could do that'. It could be as simple as baking a cake or drinking 'something' or even getting a different haircut than the usual one. Or you wish you cursed. :) Or you danced. Or sang. Or asked for forgiveness for something you wish you hadn't done. Or gave somebody a piece of your mind. Or invited a new friend that you've been thinking that you should invite but kept postponing it forever. Give it a thought. There might be something that you wished you did, but never got up and actually did that. It could be out of sheer laziness or maybe a mental block. But it never got done.

So, This month, let's get outside our comfort zone and dare to do at least one thing that we want to but held back for some reason. And then make a post about it here with the label 'Theme for December' or 'Stepping out'.

Edited to add: Just wanted to clarify - This is not a long term thing - as in 'learn to play guitar' or 'start exercising' or 'will get up early from now on' or' start enjoying life more'. This dare is a one time thing. It is not required to do continue doing it for this dare, but If you wish to continue that lifelong, more power to you! :) Say, you want to dance but something had held you back all along, just close all the doors, switch on the music - something that will make you shake your leg and booty and rock on! And after that's done, think of something else that you wish you did and do that. Pick as many of your wishes as you want. And remember to post something about that. You don't have go into details if you don't want to but do share with us as much as you can and esp. how you felt.

And yes, kodi's mom, you guessed it right. This month's theme is to unwind a bit, loosen up a little and be all geared up to embrace the new year with both hands. :)

Now, Step out of your comfort zone. I double dare you! :)
- Kay