School Chale Hum

(This post by Sandeepa)



School Chale Hum....Beautiful !!!!


Found it at Ammani's

Protect yourself and your family - Online Safety

This issue is close to heart for many reasons - One, I've had a stalker(not creepy but very annoying nonetheless) during my teen ages and that had bothered me in many ways. Second, two of my online friends were troubled by a stranger, who knew their whereabouts from reading the online interaction of my friends in a discussion group.

We blog, comment, write about ourselves pretty freely, mostly with the idea that you are sharing the post with like minded bloggers or moms...which in our mind translates to harmless people. But , in reality, we never know what kind of 'creatures' read our posts. Some of the mommy bloggers had figured out a way to see what brings the readers to their sites and some of the search words are not very nice. So, we have to watch out for the kind of information that we are sharing on our blogs.. It might reveal our/our children's whereabouts which we don't want those unwanted readers to know.

What not to reveal

• Full names, date of birth, place of birth etc - not yours, not your child's and not anybody else's.
• Places that you visit frequently... eg: Every Wednesday you goto this xyz park... or every Sunday we attend the Presbyterian church near to this school etc
• Address and phone numbers of course
• About an activity that you are planning in recent future - say, a blog meet at starbucks on 3rd street at 3 pm... or a birthday party at chuckycheese on el camino and lawrence at 6 pm.

I could go on, but this list had made my life more easier. It is a list for young children to keep in mind when they talk to strangers online, but most can be relevant to us too. Please read that and pass on to your friends or young kids that you know, who hang out on the net.

Potty Training Tips That Help

Some days back Dee had questions on Potty Training. From all the responses I have gleaned gems and gathered them in this post.
Since these are experiences and tips from real life Moms they should definitely be very useful

Right Time to Start

This is very debatable and also differs from child to child. Also the climate, your patience, how much help you have, determines the right age to start.
In India kids are potty trained pretty early on as the climate being hot it is possible to let the kids go diaper/panty free for a longer period of time. When there are accidents which is bound to happen, a quick wash both of the bottom and floor resolves the problem
This I found a difficult aspect here, I was hesitant of my daughter going around without diapers and wetting up my carpet and stuff everyday if I started to train her at 1 year. As many of the moms said the entire task of training is much easier and shorter if we start when the child is ready.
How do you know ?
Try training at around 22-24 months by making a routine of taking the child to the potty at scheduled intervals. If you feel the child does not understand the concept let go and wait for a couple of more months

Here is what mummyjaan said
“Our DD started demonstrating awareness - at around 20 months alright. By that I mean if I left her nappyless (in short/pants without diapers) she would squirm and get uncomfortable before needing to go. We didn't actually try to potty-train her till she was 24 months.But it wasn't until she was about 29 - 30 months before she actually 'got the idea'. And when it clicked for her ('the *small* potty seat is for *me*, for going to the potty'), then she kinda self-trained in a week, with little input from me.”

Get a Potty or Potty Seat

Get a colorful character potty seat or a potty. I personally feel the seats are much better. Start a routine. After breakfasts in the morning try to make the child sit on it. While he/she is there, try reading books etc. to give an idea that it is fun. Again try to take him/her to the bathroom after fixed intervals.
If your child already has a routine when he goes potty (i.e for BM) it might be easier.

Asha says
“Boys are little tough to train. Still buy a colorful potty with cartoon characters on it and tell him it's for the "big boy" and make him sit on it even when he is not needing to go.Some kids are just scared to go near it if you make them go when they need to.He will slowly get the idea.Accident happens when you start without the diaper but he will learn eventually.Reward him even if he just sits on it.”

Swapna and mnamma echo similar thoughts

Give Awards

My daughter’s daycare teachers helped a lot with the potty training. She started both the part time day care and subsequently the training around 25-26 months after a failed attempt by me at 23 months.
One thing I noticed that at school the peer pressure helped. So the teachers gave out stickers etc. for success and the clamor for getting more stickers gave a big boost to the whole process. I continued the award series at home too.

DR says
“Bought some stickers..so the day he succeeded he was given one and he could paste it on his cupboard door..and we would count them together..sometimes even call papa to have a look....and he glowed and beamed!!”

No Pull ups or Diaper

I did use pull ups for some time but I stopped using them at home when I started training. It seems using the pull up and also using the potty gives a child mixed message. It didn’t really take very long to get trained once the idea got into her head so there were very few accidents and my carpet was dry :D

GTN says
“The discomfort from being wet without a diaper propels them quickly into wanting to use the potty :P But then, every child is different so what worked for me might not work for you. Also, don't make a big deal out of it (or any accidents for that matter). Don't worry about carpets if you have them and keep a lot of paper towels, newspapers and the phone number to a good carpet cleaner handy :P”

Night time training

Start this once the child is trained during the day. Do not give milk or water at bedtime. After a drink, brushing etc. take him/her to the bathroom as the last step in the bedtime routine. Try to take him/her once more around mid night.
In my daughter’s case she does not go to the bathroom during the night. This I had seen from her pull ups being dry on most days so night training had not been difficult.

Some good tips for night time training are here :
http://www.pottytrainingtips.com/staying-tips.htm

Important Tips on Hygiene while Potty Training

Some very good tips are in here :
http://www.pottytrainingtips.com/maintaining-tips.htm

Remember little girls wipe front to back. Also it seems rather than wiping hard we should teach them to go “pat, pat” to avoid irritation
Another thing is have the pack of moist wipes ready. After the child has cleaned himself/herself do a clean up with the moist wipe. At least I always do that.

Don't Stress, Be Cool

Do not get stressed or stress the child. Make it a fun thing. He/she will get trained maybe a little early or late, doesn’t really matter.

Some more tips from here
http://www.pottytrainingtips.com/preparing-tips.htm

August has passed ....

Linda has a great theme for this month Back To School!. The scramble to get everything in order, the alarms that stop working, the school bus being missed, the argument over lunch, the list is endless. It will be fun to see what members come up with.

I want to thank everyone for participating and sharing ideas for the August Theme SAHM Vs WM. It was an interesting exchange of ideas for sure. One of the most surprising aspects at least for me is each posters comfort and satisfaction with the choice they have made. It has been a healthy discussion and we come away with a greater realization and understanding of different viewpoints and should try our hardest to respect them.

We all agree that SAHM Vs WM is not one versus the other rather each one's most comfortable way of getting there. "It is meant not to mean what Plaintiff Vs Defendant would mean rather travelling by Plane Vs Travelling by Train, means to the same end." And Tharini summed it up nicely "May we all get there, in this life, without too much heartache...."

We also realize and should never forget the fact, that for a majority of moms in this world There is no Choice...



Here is some food for thought, an article from Yahoo Finance - To Raise Baby Einsteins, TLC Will Suffice


Thanks everybody and have a great weekend.

Theme For September

ISG chose a *hot* theme for August -- SAHM or WM?
That was a great topic and a tough act to follow!
What better than to take ISG's weather idea and run with it?

With autumn advancing, little chill in the mornings and maple trees just beginning to turn, I thought about this for a theme:

Back To School!

Do you have school-aged kids?

I sent my baby girl to her sophomore year of high school today, and on Monday will send my firstborn off to sophomore year of college; where has the time gone?!? As many Septembers as we’ve done this, I still feel that tiny twinge of bittersweet tugging at my heart… nostalgic longing for the little ones they once were, but more, immense pride in the young adults they have become.

One thing we moms all have in common -- sending our children to school can be a little traumatic for everyone involved — the young scholar, Mom and Dad, even a younger sibling left at home. This is especially true if we're sending our baby off for the first time! As a veteran of many “back-to-school” days, I can tell you that no matter how frightening it may seem to watch your little one toddle out into the big wide world, their joy in sharing their accomplishments with you, and your delight in them will soon erase any fears. It gets easier as time goes on, but you, too, may feel that little twinge tugging at your heart.

Feel free to share your thoughts, feelings, fears, hopes and aspirations for your kids as we send them “back to school”.

Also, if you take photos of the ‘first day’ like I always do, feel free to share those as well, if you’re comfortable with that! (Photos are ok with the administrators — I already checked with Sandeepa although I think she wanted me to post a pic of my classic PB-and-J sandwich!).

Here are my kids on their respective 'first days', way back when they were just babies, "toddling off" :)





If your kids aren't yet school-aged, or if they're grown and gone, feel free to share your thoughts regardless. Likewise, if you home-school, please share that with us as well. Or perhaps we have some teachers among us... everyone's thoughts are welcome! No hard and fast rules -- it's all about learning and watching our little ones grow :)

I look forward to reading your ideas, and thanks Sandeepa, for the chance to post a Theme of the Month :)

Introduction and my thoughts on WAHM/WOHM

Hello to all you wonderful Mums out there,

I'm a new member here. Thank you, Sandeepa, for adding me to the group.

Originally from Hyderabad, I now live in Europe - so I miss the sunshine! That says it all about the weather here, I guess :-)

I am a mother of 2 girls, and currently a SAHM (stay-at-home Mum). My girls are both under 4 years of age. I have grown to define myself first and most as a mother, and I marvel at this fact and wonder at the change in myself that motherhood has wrought.

It took me a while to understand this - that being a Mum deserves to be called a 'career' in it's own right - it's a job that requires endless patience and inventiveness. So now when somebody asks me what I'm doing about my 'career', I ask, "which one? I have 2. I'm concentrating on the first one. The second career is temporarily on hold. I'll go back to it when these 2 little critters don't need me as much as they do now".

I have keenly followed the topic of SAHM/WOHM on this forum. Many of you have written your views eloquently. They've all been interesting. You've mostly said it all, and I don't think there is much to add.

You know, it's not a 'this-versus-that' thing at all. It's not a question of which do you think is better, it's a question of what you want for your children/family and how you decide to reach that goal. It's a question of priorities. And it's unique to every situation, every family.

I think there are many people here who've worked and stayed at home at various times in their life. All parents would agree on one point - you do what you have to do to give your family the best chance in life. (Applies as much to me and you as to the poor women leaving their families and going abroad to do domestic duties. As far as this point is concerned, it's all down to our primal instinct to do what we think will be best for our kids.)

At the moment, I have decided to not work for as long as is necessary for my girls and family. I realize that as they grow older and spend more time at school, I will have plenty of time at my disposal.

I'll work again -later - because it's unfair to not use my professional talent and expertise. It took about 12 years to acquire it, so it would not be right to waste it away. As a medical professional, I can do immense good for the society I live in. So I will......just as soon as both my kiddies are in school for the greater part of the day.

On my first break, after working for 10 years, I was pretty much enslaved by my firstborn (she was demanding, temperamental, spirited and one step ahead of me - still is ). I had become a real homebody, when a very good job offer came my way. After a lot of thought, I started working again full-time. It was tough for all three of us. I worked till she was nearly 3, when I took another break for my second child.

This time, I had learnt enough from experience to make the decision to stay at home for at least 2 years after the birth.

Although some days they drive me crazy and make me admit that practicing medicine was a lot easier, on the whole I cherish the time I have with them. Their childhood won't come back.

I want to say that our children are not the only ones growing - so are we. We grow and learn from our experiences every day.

So I've changed from a staunch career-woman ("I want to be Head of the Dept before 35") to a 'working Mum' (oxymoron isn't it - who works harder than Mums?) who was willing to accept 'some' compromises("okay, okay, I'll get there before 45"), to a now mostly SAHM who won't even consider working till her child is at least 2 years ("I'll settle for doing something good for society while looking after my precious girls - somebody else can be the HOD").

That's how kids change you. And it's good that they do. I have accepted this change with happiness.

For now, I'm not in a rush to get anywhere further career-wise. At my own pace, I'll get there :-).

When there is no Choice....

Last week while I was driving back home from work, I heard an interview with Nisha Varia on NPR. Nisha Varia is a researcher with the Human Rights watch and I was not able to get the transcript of the interview on NPR, but her talk was centered around the abuse of Domestic Workers. This article, though not from NPR is on the same lines of her talk.

What touched me most was when asked why do these women workers choose to work abroad(in this case they were talking of Saudi Arabia which is a large employer of domestic workers) inspite of knowing the horror stories, she said that many of them cry to leave behind their children and family whom they might not see again for a long time but they do it to provide their children with food and basic amenities.

And I thought while we discuss our choices of staying at home or working outside let us take a glance at those millions of female migrant workers, many of whom are mothers, who work not because they have a choice but because they want to bring food to the table


"Human Rights Watch said that the numbers of women migrants has increased significantly over the last three decades, and they now comprise approximately half of the estimated 200 million migrants worldwide. The feminization of labor migration is particularly pronounced in the Philippines, Indonesia and Sri Lanka, where national-level estimates indicate that women comprise 60-75 percent of legal migrants, many of whom are employed as domestic workers in the Middle East and Asia. " (Source here)

Inspite of the abuse these women turn to work as domestic help to earn money and to provide their children with a better life


“Millions of women and girls turn to domestic work as one of the few economic opportunities available to them,” said Varia. “Abuses often take place in private homes and are totally hidden from the public eye.”

This is just an example, there are millions of mothers out there who work not to buy a BMW but to buy basic food for their children.

Do you think we as a community could do anything for them ? Please drop in your suggestions or if you are associated with any such organisation and have a clue as how someone could help let us know.

We at least have a choice and let's be grateful for that.